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There are many opinions on the cause behind the high rate of divorce in America today. Leaving out the opinions on this, there are some very simple facts of what's it's like to be in a "LONG TERM" relationship.
Statistically, relationships involving people who get married prior to age 24 account for 85% of the failures of marriages. Biologically, this is when females reach full mature on the physical, emotional, and hormonal levels. At this point, a woman is fully prepared to have and handle children, and better prepared to handle a father that is still not fully mature.
Males don't reach full physical and hormonal maturity until age 30. This is also when they reach their peak emotional maturity, though not to the point of being fully independent. Half of the emotional health and support of any male comes from a woman. The biochemical frequency range of the male brain adjusts itself to match that of the female, developing an emotional symbiotic relationship.
Couples who begin cohabiting and/or get married prior to age 24 can find themselves drawing away from each other as each reaches full maturity. Their whole view of the world, and each other, changes. This doesn't happen to all couples, but clearly it is a factor in most relationship breakdowns.
In a couple, who has made the right choices, and found that person who truly compliments them, a symbiotic relationship also develops on the physical level. There is a reason why humans were designed to be monogamous. It comes down to the sexual experience that goes beyond pleasure and reproduction.
Seminal plasma (fluid carrying semen) and vaginal fluids contain addition chemicals that the other sex needs. Chemicals in seminal plasma help strengthen the Uterine Wall, not only making it stronger for the carrying of a fetus, but also because the uterus provides physical support for other organs, such as the bladder and the intestinal tract. For males, vaginal fluid reinforces their immune system and affects future production of semen. But, there's a downside.
The human body adapts to the specific molecular makeup of the seminal plasma and vaginal fluid. The two bodies develop a symbiotic relationship that becomes dependent upon the other. Having multiple partners keeps these functions in constant disarray, always trying to adapt to a new molecular makeup, affecting the overall health of the individual.
This is one of the reasons, and benefits, of developing a long term monogamous relation. But, for men there are additional benefits.
A married male lives an average 20 years longer than a single male. Aside from the physical symbiosis, because a woman provides emotional support, he has less stress, an overall cause of frequent death in males.
For a female, her reproductive and sexual health last longer, not only with the ability to reproduce into her 40s and even 50s, but also continue the ability for sexual pleasure well into the later years.
A monogamous couple become a single, symbiotic unit, standing ready to take on what the world throws at them. They provide the umbrella of strength for the family and the protection of any children. They are the core element from which the children draw their knowledge and experience of what a family should be, so that they may follow the example of the parents, when they reach maturity and venture out into the world.
This is what it is truly like to be in a relationship, when you make the right choices in the very beginning. But, this does not mean they should cohabit until marriage.
Should We Live Together?
What Young Adults Need to Know about Cohabitation before Marriage
David Popenoe and Barbara Dafoe Whitehead
Rutgers University Study
Cohabiting couples breakup three times more than married couples. Cohabiting couples that later marry have a 46% higher rate of divorce than those who did not cohabit prior to marriage.
See Also:
Sooner vs. Later: Is there an ideal age for first marriage?
By Sharon Jayson, USA TODAY
